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Could I Be Close To You?

July 27, 2023

Would it be okay
If I came and stayed
Somewhere even close to you?
Where at least I’d see the shape of you?
…Wait a while, hear the breath of you?
…Little longer, ear to the chest of you?
…Let me stumble somewhere I’d be next to you.

In the morning wake the dawn with you -
First blink, first light, first yawn with you.
Then face the day - work, rest, and pray
That I’d stay close to you.
That I’d be okay with being somewhere close to you

Instead of hiding in my shame
Scared you’d find me there again -
In some place I don’t believe I could be close to you.

Sweet Friend, I’d rather run away
Than impose myself on you today
Why would someone good like you want me even close to you?
Surely, you who formed my inmost being,
and knows my thoughts before my thinking,
Surely you know every reason why I can’t be close to you.

Don’t get me wrong, I would be thankful for your grace
But then deny you to your face,
Sing “man of sorrows, what a name!”
Then run away from you.
And that’s the side of me I just don’t care for you to see -
You deserve a better friend than me,
You know, someone who’d stay close to you.

But here I am again - You are that better friend
You’ve had every chance to leave, but still you want me close to you.
So what am I supposed to do?
Run? I can’t outrun you!
There’s nothing here for me
Unless I’m close to you.

So if you want me, here I am.
Tangled, twisted, double-minded little man.
Simple sinner that I am,
Please, could I be close to you?

And if I can, then would you stay?
Close my eyes, would you remain?
When I awake, see you again?

Stick around, my precious Friend.
We’ll chase the day until it’s ends.
Saving blood, the wound amended.
Sinner once, now Child befriended.
Forever close, rebellion ended.

In Poems, Heart "Leakage"
← The Word "Deconstruction" Is Broken.Abide →

WELCOME.

My promise is honesty and messiness. Not for pity or attention... but because right here, with a few thoughts and shards of eternity, I meet God, who adores me; King of my every fiber - blood, bone, and breath. He has me in His grip and, settling into His furious love, I find rest in Him.

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